If you’ve ever been through a difficult time and then things started to improve it can be hard to try to work towards anything more than what you have. The fear of returning to the state you used to be in is so strong it’s hard to move forward. So instead of going for more and possibly failing you enjoy being where you are. I used to think that there was something wrong with that but I don’t anymore. I don’t wonder how someone can work at the same job for twenty, thirty, forty years. I don’t wonder how a couple can stay together for more than half of their lifetimes. It makes sense to me now. I understand the difficulty in staying put and I understand of the strain of constant change. I’m at a crossroads. I don’t know which person I will be in the future – the one who was content and stayed put or the one who went for it and failed or the one who went for it and succeeded. I know that the fear of success is just as strong as the fear of failure. I know that I have one life to live but taking too long to decide what to do with it can result in stagnation. So I think about this everyday and take one more step on a path filled with risk, possibility, comfort, and turmoil.